Greetings! My name is Spamthony Gemma. I’m running for Governor Congress because I have a scheme plan to create 10,000 jobs in Rhode Island. Rhode Island needs more businessmen like me, Mitt Romney, and Don Carcieri to get this state back on track.
Let me take a moment to present you with a business opportunity.
Low risk – High return – Work your own hours!
Now’s your chance to get into the recession proof spamming industry! I’ve been having great success in the spamming industry and I want you to get in on a piece of the action. Here’s how it works!
First, I will stop buying my 500,000+ facebook fans from 3rd party vendors and will begin hiring Rhode Islanders to create fake facebook profiles. You can then use your fake facebook profile(s) to spam your friends about useful things such as plumbing services (hint: toss in a few hundred inspirational quotes and photos). You can even take it to the next level and start spamming blogs like this one!
This is just the ground floor – there’s plenty of room to move on to bigger and better opportunitie$$$. Anyone can take advantage of these emerging trends of the 21st century! I hope you’ll join me so that we can get our state back on track – together.
P.S. Vote for me, Spamthony Gemma!
This is a satirical parody posted by a member of the RI Future community.